Light

img_0270-2.jpg   This painting is called “Light”. I painted it for an exhibition (which was at the Gallery M) in which the theme was “Passages”. It was created to accompany a poem that I had written some years ago about my son Charles and I. It fit the passages theme well, I think. In the painting you can see the change from night to day. I hope you can also feel the change that occurs in the poem.

Light

Five am

Sunless as I move to leave

A plane waits

Quietly I hear: “Bye daddy”

The voice drifts out of darkness

Un-noticed he lay on the couch

Gray shadows covering him

Hiding

 

Two hearts connected

Two hearts creeping apart

Two hearts molding a hiding place

A hiding place blackening

Soon to cover two

 

Born so early he could barely fit into the crook of my arm

Now I hear a voice: “Bye daddy”

Charles, 18 now

6 feet tall now

Almost a man

Yet to me, always, “My Peanut”

 

I remember:

Long tired nights rocking back and forth

Listening to lullabies

Silly times, sitting side by side

A favorite book between

“Never change Charles” I would say to him:

“Always be my Peanut”

Though in my heart I would say:

“Always love me”

 

Time grows teenagers

 

No more rocking

No more reading

Side by side

Instead, him:

“You don’t know anything!”

“You don’t trust me!”

“You yell at me in front of my friends!”

“You don’t like me!”

 

And Me:

“You don’t do your chores!”

“You sleep too late!”

“You don’t call with your plans!”

“You don’t like me!”

Both of us hiding inside our hearts

As the light dims

 

Then, out of the dark, a soft voice

Now, the shadows lifting, lifting

I hear “Bye daddy” and I know my Peanut heard

He heard: “Always love me”

I say “Goodbye Charles”

And in two hearts

The light begins to brighten

Now, I can see him

Now I can fly

 

 

 

 

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